Jetfire was my wingman

Our date started at a Chinese restaurant that was closed for a Chinese birthday. So we moved around the Pacific Rim to a Thai restaurant where I produced 1.5 Liter bottles of Sprite Zero and Jetfire(Coke Zero) and asked for two glasses of ice. Normally, I would NEVER do this, but they were from a pre-date purchase at Duane Reade, so why not?
"Because it's white trashy..?"
PERHAPS!
I wasn't head over heels for this woman, but I believe in things like "getting to know you" and "falling in love" and "bringing your own soda on the first date". So we saw "Intersection" at the Magnet(good) and then on a whim drove down to see "Too much light makes the baby go blind"(good) and even had time for ice cream first! What a nice date! Here's when I realized physicality was not on the menu: On the car drive down to TMLMTBGB she reached over to buckle in my shoulder belt, and as she's reaching across my body I say something jokey-flirty like "Oh, MY, well I..."
She interrupts: "No, really, it's not like that. I didn't mean it that way. It's not like that."
Whew, what a relief! Now that the pressure's off, let's go to a bar, ask for glasses, pour more Jetfire and Sprite Zero from their bottles into those glasses, and toast to our not fucking. You don't have to have physical intimacty to have a nice date, kids! Sure you COULD hook up, and even purchase drinks from the same establishment in which you're dining, but where is the romance and mystery in that? I don't even WANT to know, girl!